What a day!

Well as I anticipated the fundraiser was terrible horrible. Is that even correct English? Anyway, it was me, my family, Sherri and her kids, and Melony and her family. Can you believe that all that work put into it for NOTHING. I felt so bad. Even the girls that worked wouldn't let me pay them. They said to put that money towards the walk. I was so horribly disappointed. I just wanted to cry. I felt bad that she opened up the whole facility to us for nothing. I need to find something nice to do for her. Any ideas? I told her I would put her organization name on our banner for the walk and email her a Picture. But I was embarrasses and disappointed. I tried to handle it with grace and act as if it didn't bother me, but the truth is it did. I bothered me alot. I feel sad that it was for a great cause and no one showed up. Why does everything I do fail? Am I just a failure in life. I sire feel like it. I hate that. Well enough of my pitty party.
This week has been a long one. Michael was gone until tonight, I am so Glad he finally got home. The girls have been good, but it is hard to get everything done alone. Thank God for my neighbors who took Hailee to school everyday so I didn't have to get everybody out the door by 7:20. I was approved to be a troop leader for Hailee's brownies so that is good. Now I just have to get the troop together. I do new leader orientation on Monday then next Saturday Brownie age level training. It will be alot of work, but it will be fun. I also took over as playgroup leader for MOMS club, and from my old playgroup that I didn't fit with today I got an email saying they no longer wanted to be a MOMS Club playgroup. I have to wonder if they just don't want to deal with me. But who knows. So we will see how that goes too. anyway I am tired I will update more tomorrow. Goodnight. Hug and kiss your family and tell them you love them, today is gone and tomorrow may never come........

Click to help

Click the picture of Ben to follow the link.

Well I havent posted in a while so I thought I would post tonight. The above link I posted is from a family that I follwed and was heartbroken when Ben died. I see Garrett so much in him. I cried as I watched the video, but I think what this family is doing to honor Ben's legacy is such a great thing. If you can help please do this is truly a great cause. That is all I am going to post for tonight. As I post agin i will keep this link on the side of the page so you can click it at anytime.

BTW Tomorrow is my fundraiser please pray for a great turn out for a great cause!

It's Friday

Another week has passed. Wed, was as always a busy day for us. Lainey went to school, Hailee went to school. Then after school we went to the Wallace’s to play. They have a new dog and Garrett absolutely loved it. They played together for a long time until he pulled her hair then she was done with him. LOL Then we went to cheerleading, where Lainey once again got to cheer with the big girls. She loves it. I can’t wait until she is old enough to really do cheerleading. Thursday, Hailee went to school, and then we came home and played outside. We came home, I fixed dinner, and then I went out to MNO with the MOMS club for wine tasting. It was nice to get out. And I am really trying to reconnect with MOMS Club. Today the kids were out of school, so we went to gymnastics this morning. Then we went to play at the park. Hailee has a rough time at the park, first I was trying to swing her I pushed her and she fell out of the swing. She wasn’t holding on. Then as she was yelling at me for that a bee stung her. She was beside herself and was yelling at me. I tried to calm her. I had a first aid kit in my car that had after bite in it, so we were headed to the car when she said I want to go home, so I gathered everyone and everything up and we headed to the car. The whole time Hailee was screaming and I couldn’t get her to calm down. We got to the car, I put the after bite on it and she was still crying She said “ I am never coming back to this park” I explained to her that the park wasn’t the problem, bees live everywhere, so then she said “ I am never going outside again”. So I said fine but it would be a boring life inside all the time. We came home, and she did stay inside for a long time, but then she decided she was going outside, so she went outside, and all was well again. We have 2 birthday parties tomorrow and one on Sunday and Michael is leaving Sunday until Thursday. So we will be without him this week. Luckily he will be home in time for the fundraiser on Thursday. Man I hope we have a good turn out. I am getting worried, what if it is a flop. I will fell awful that the lady has donated the facility to me and that I have wasted all this time and effort. So say a prayer for me that it is a success. I have given flyers to everyone I can think of, I have posted it everywhere I can find, emailed to everyone I can think of. So I pray that it will be good. It is not to late if you want to donate. Please do so. Iof you are in the area, please sing up to walk with our team or as an individual this can make a big difference.
http://teams.lightthenight.org/FriendsofHeroes_VolunteerLanding

I continue on my journey through life each passing day with my family and without my grandma. I wish my family was closer it is so hard to live so far and not be able to stop at my moms or my dads. I love this area and would be content to live the rest of my life here, but I still wish that we were home. I see people who live close to their family and they get to spend time with them, they get to see their grandchildren grow and it is hard not to wish I had that. Not to wish I could call my family and say hey can you watch the kids while I run an errand, or hey come over for dinner we would love to have you. The holidays are again approaching and we will be here for thanksgiving again without our family. We will of course go home for Christmas and I can’t wait. I wish that I could see my dad and step-mom this year too. I hope maybe we can work it out where we can see them too. My step-mom has been so great to us; I don’t know what I would do with out her. And I miss her and my dad so much. I haven’t seen her since Garrett was born, and I haven’t seen may dad in like 2 years. How can it be that we are so busy that we can’t make a little time to spend with them? But we are, and that wont change.

The kids are well, finally all over their coughs although Lainey has had an upset stomach today and I am hoping she feels better tomorrow. Garrett still has a rash, and I am wondering now if it was from the MMR vaccine that contains eggs. But we are trying to control it. His reflux doesn’t seem to be any better and I continue to pray that it gets better. I can’t stand the thought of them scoping him. I just don’t know that I can watch them do that to him. Anyway, thanks for checking on us, till next time remember to hug and kiss your family and tell them you love them, today is gone and tomorrow may never come………………

Well today was much like any Tuesday, I got Hailee up got her ready for school sent her off. Spent the morning playing with Lainey and Garrett. Bathes then lunch. nap and off to get Hailee. As I go through my day to day life I feel grateful that I have this life. I am grateful for my three great children. I am grateful for the friends I have made at our many stops along this life. I look at my kids and I think will they ever truly know how much they mean to their mom. Well maybe when they have kids of their own. I have sat and thought about the life we lead for the past few weeks and how luck we are to have the great family we have. With each passing day I think that is one day closer I am to my Grandma, and one day further I am from missing her. Days still continue to be hard, as I know they will probably always be. I miss her each day, but each day I think of all the good things she did and the great woman she was. She was truly the greatest women I have ever know and I am proud that she was my grandma. I strive to someday be even half of the women she was.






Today I got out all of Hailee's 3t clothes for Lainey. Lainey was so excited and her face just lit up at the thought of all these clothes and the fact that they had been Hailee's. It was cute she wanted to try them on, and even wore one today even though it was long sleeved and it was really too warm for it she was insistent on wearing it. Then when Hailee got home from school and saw them she said " Mommy I heard you talking about giving away our old clothes to another little girl and I like my hello kitty Jammie's I don't want to give them away" I told her I was giving them to Lainey and then we would pass them to Talia(my BF's little girl) she said no mommy I don't see Talia so I cant see her wear them. So I told her we would keep them with out special keep clothes. She is so cute.






Here are the Jammie's she liked so much.





Yesterday she decided that she wants to set up a lemonade stand to raise money for the Leukemia Lymphoma Society. She decided this all on her own and I thought it was so sweet.





We let tutu Froggy go in the back yard today. Hailee was sad that we were letting it go, but I explained to her that we cant keep the turtle in the house. God wanted it to be outside with other turtles not inside in a tote. She was still upset and kept bringing it back into the house. finally she took it out and got busy playing long enough for the turtle to make its escape. Lainey was fine with letting him go. She said Bye Bye turtle and she was done. She did ask later for me to go get it, but I explained it lived outside and she said ok mommy.






Pictures of Tutu Froggy. Lainey colored the shell pink.



Garrett has developed some kind of rash, it is allergy related, but we are not sure to what. I have to out an ointment on it, and then we will have to watch and see if we can figure out what brought it on. I think maybe it was cats. The person who lived here before had cats and I think maybe that is bothering him. But we will see. I took some pictures of my house to share, so here you go. I probably should have cleaned it up a little more before the pictures but hey I have 3 kids you get what you get. LOL









This is coming in from the front door (busters spot)






The living room view from the front door






What started out as the office and is now the playroom view from the front door






The dinning room view from the living room






The Kitchen view from the back hallway















Going up the stairs from the front door










View of the upstairs hallway from our room. The closed door is Garrett's room the room you see is the girls.









View of Garrett's room from the hallway









Garrett's room notice the pink walls









Opposite side of Garrett's room






Our bedroom

Our bedroom view from our bathroom






Our bathroom never mind the little girl in the tub lol








Another view of our bathroom not sure why the picture is so bad.






Lyndon's room from the hallway



Lyndon's room

Lyndon's closet complete with a window in it.


The kids bathroom view from the hallway

The girls room view from the hallway

the girls play closet view from their bedroom

Whew I spent about an hour preparing this post, then lost my connection. Luckily blogger is smart enough to save as you go so it wasn't all lost. LOL

I found this on the blog of Jenny and thought it was cute and I would post it too. Eight things about me.
1. I am very impatient. I hate to wait on anything. I think mostly this has to do with control issues, I like to be in control of everything and this is not something I have control over.

2. I am not a very self confident person. Despite what it may seem I don't have a very high opinion of myself and I have a constant need for acceptance. Often I am not accepted for me or who I am and I want to change myself to be what others would like me to be. Although I know I cant do this it really gets to me when I feel someone doesn't like me.

3. I never saw myself as the motherly type, and still don't some days. You know as you grow up you have this dream of how your life will be, yes mine had kids but I guess I never really thought of having them. I wanted kids before Hailee came along but I just never dreamed I would be a SAHM.

4. Each day that comes I learn I can make it through no matter what happens and tomorrow is a new day.

5. I truly never believed that I would loose one of my grandparents. They have always been the 2 most stable people in my life, the people I couldn't live without and I knew it would be hard to live without them but never dreamed it would really happen. But it did, my grandma is gone for over a year now and I am surviving despite what I thought. I have learned I am stronger than I knew.

6. I talk to my 2 best friends almost everyday and although they are both far away, I never see our friendships ending. They have always and will always be like sisters to me and I don't know how I would make it without them. Each has contributed to my life in different and special ways. And for that I love them.

7. I want to go back to work. I love working and I would go back if I could take my kids, but I don't want to miss the time with them. I plan to go back at least a couple of days next year when I can put Garrett in MDO with Lainey.

8. I love to wake to a clean house. There is nothing better then the feeling I get when I wake up and everything is cleaned up and in its place.

Well that is all for tonight thanks for checking on us, till next time remember to hug and kiss yourfamily and tell them you love them, today is gone and tomrrow may never come..........

I got an error message I will post the rest of the pictures of the house tomorrow I am tired. Sorry

We have a new friend

I hope you all had a great weekend. Yesterday when we took Michael to get his car, there was a little turtle in the parking lot. Michael pointed it out to me as he was driving away, so of course I had to bring it home. The girls are in love with it and have named it tutu froggy. Hailee came up with tutu and Lainey with Froggy. She gets frogs and turtles confused alot. Anyway my intention was to bring it home and let it go, but the girls were having no part of that. they made it a little home with grass, and we have been feeding it dog food which it seems to like. They take it out and let it walk in the yard ALOT, but they are careful that they don't loose site of it so they can bring it bag inside. I hate to keep this poor turtle in the house, but the girls are enjoying it so much. At some point we will have to let it go and I know they will be heartbroken. This is the second turtle I have saved, the first was in the rain on the side of busy street a couple of months ago, and after I let it go they looked for it everyday. It is so cute. i will take a picture of tutu tomorrow so you can see him. Again today for the 3rd week in a row someone woke up sick. Today it was Lainey again, she came in and in this poor little voice she said Mommy I cant talk. I felt bad for her, so again we did not go to church to share our germs. I spent the day unpacking the last of the boxes, it was just pictures, but I got everyones room done but the girls, so I need to hang their stuff and we will be done. I really like my new house and would love to just stay here for the rest of my life. We don't have a great yard, but we like the house and the yard is good enough. So I am praying that Michael's job stuff works out here or he finds a new job here and we can just stay here for good. We like the area and I am starting to really find a new life here. SO please pray that it works out for us here.

This past week has been a hard one for those of our former home, three officers were shot and killed last Saturday. My mom knew all three of them, and she has had to deal with this. Let me tell you a little about what happened. The OPD received a domestic disturbance call, and responded. When they got there the wife was out front ready to leave and told them her husband was drunk and they had her permission to enter the house through the back. As the officers rounded the back the guy opened fire with a shotgun. Two of the officers were killed immediately. Shot in the head. The guy then went inside until 2 hours later when he surrendered. My understanding is he was a real SOB. One of the officers managed to shoot him, so he was taken to the ER where he was an ass to the nurses and Dr.s working on him. The third officer was airlifted to Lubbock and was on life support before passing on Thursday. The community had rallied in support for these officers and their family, heck the state has rallied behind them Lubbock was paying for the officers to come to visit their fellow officer while he was in the hospital, including food and lodging for them . The Lubbock officers also came to Odessa to work the PD the day of the funerals so the entire PD could be there. Isn't that great? Too bad it takes something so tragic to bring a community together. The funeral for the third officer is on Tuesday. Please pray for all these families as they struggle to make sense of what has happened, and move on without their loved ones. Anyway that is it for tonight. Please remember to hug and kiss your family and tell them you love them, today is gone and tomorrow may never come....................

The week has come to a close

Well as the week comes to a close. We have had a busy one. After school today, I took the girls to the library then we came home to clean up the mess they had in their room. It looked like they had been her 30 years rather than 30 days. I cant believe they could make such a mess. I guess I should be grateful that Hailee has been picking it up. But is it really too much to ask that she put the toys where they belong? We had been cleaning about 2 hours when out neighbor called and asked if the girls could come play. So I let them go. We started to head out the door and my other neighbor came and rand the bell. I answered to her and a little boy probably 6 or 7 standing at the door and he was in tears. She was babysitting, and he was throwing rocks and hit my car with one and scratched it. Now I wasn't happy that he had scratched my car, but i went and looked and it was a little scratch, and he was SO upset I felt really bad for him. I explained to him that it was an accident, and I wasn't mad and that I thought it was really big of him to come and tell me because alot of kids would not have done that. But this poor little boy was so upset he could hardly catch his breath. i felt so bad for him. I gave him a hug and told him I wasn't mad the car could be fixed and as long as he wasn't hurt it was fine. I know he thought he was in big trouble. Poor kid. Things happen and it was an accident. Anyway then we left for the neighbors she has 3 kids 2 girls the same age as mine and a little boy that is 2 months older than Garrett. She is the one that has the cute house I want. Anyway we played over there until I realized it was 8pm and we hadn't even eaten dinner yet. So we headed home. When I got home Lyndon told me he wanted to go to the football game, so we all inhaled our food and I drove him there. Michael was out with some friends from work. So as soon as I got Lyndon dropped off and the girls in bed, Michael's friend called and Michael could not drive home. And they were on completely the opposite side of town. So I walked across the street and my neighbor came over and sat with the girls while I went to pick him up. My neighbor said you are alot nicer than my wife would be, she would be furious, so I explained this is not Michael he never does this and I was glad he didn't drive so I would go get him. So I got home put Garrett to bed and Michael to bed and Lyndon got home from the football game and now the day is over. Man am I glad it was a long day. We will have to finish cleaning the room tomorrow we are almost done and then we shall see what tomorrow brings. I will post more tomorrow for now I am off to bed.

Updated look

Do you like the new look? I found this cool site called pimpmyprofile.com they do all kinds of layouts. I thought I needed a change, so I added breast cancer ribbons. I hope you can still read the text all right. If you didn't read the post from earlier today I will update you. I finally got a fundraiser set up for my Light the Night walk. I am very excited about this fundraiser. Please say a prayer for me that we have a good turn out. It will be at Bounce USA, and all of the proceeds will benefit the Leukemia Lymphoma Society. I am very excited. Kathy the owner was gracious enough to donate her facility. She is a great lady. I was totally not expecting that. So we have it set up for Thursday Sept. 27th from 5:30pm-7:00pm a family jump night. If you know anyone in the area please pass the info along. Well I am off to bed I am tired. Thanks until next time remember to hug and kiss your family and tell them you love them, today is gone and tomorrow may never come.............

fundraiser to benefit LTN

Join us in a family fun Jump event to benefit the Leukemia Lymphoma Society


Where: Bounce USA
West Beaver Creek Road in Powell TN
When: Thursday September 27, 2007
Time: 5:30-7:00pm
Cost: $7.00
All proceeds will go to the Light the Night Walk to benefit the Leukemia Lymphoma Society
Contact: Christy Be sure to bring your socks everyone will have to wear socks to enter jump area.
Concessions will be available to purchase through Bounce USA.
Waivers will need to be signed to enter jump area.

where were you?

On the 6th anniversary of Sept. 11, I thought I would post a tribute post to those who lost thier lives on that horrible day. A tribute to those who are currently fighting for our freedom. A tribute to those who worked endlessley on and after Sept 11th to rescue, recover and clean up one of our countries greatest tragedy's. A tribute to all th firefighters and EMS who worked so hard and still do for us each day. Where were you on that day? What were you doing?

I was lying in bed nursing Hailee watching the today show as the events of that day unfolded. Michael had just gotten home from Atlanta the night before, he was supposed to fly home on Sept 11, but he tool a flight that night and got home late that night. I was so glad he was home. I woke him to tell him a plane had flown into the twin towers, at that point we werent sure what was going on, as we watched the second plane fly into the towers and then news of 2 other planes that were also being highjacked. I remember thinking what have I brought my child into? What horrible world have I brought her into? I still feel that way to some extent, but I am happy to have my children here with me, and I know that we have thousands of men and women fighting to protect our freedom and keeep this from happening again. Anyway I will close with the lyrics to Where were you by Alan Jackson and some picutres let us not forget.

"Where Were You (When The World Stopped Turning)

"Where were you when the world stopped turning that September day

Out in the yard with your wife and childrenWorking on some stage in LA

Did you stand there in shock at the site of That black smoke rising against that blue sky

Did you shout out in anger

In fear for your neighbor

Or did you just sit down and cry

Did you weep for the childrenWho lost their dear loved ones

And pray for the ones who don't know

Did you rejoice for the people who walked from the rubble

And sob for the ones left below

Did you burst out in prideFor the red white and blue

The heroes who died just doing what they do

Did you look up to heaven for some kind of answer

And look at yourself to what really matters

I'm just a singer of simple songs

I'm not a real political man

I watch CNN but I'm not sure I can tell youThe difference in Iraq and Iran

But I know Jesus and I talk to God

And I remember this from when I was youngFaith hope and love are some good things he gave us

And the greatest is love

Where were you when the world stopped turning that September day

Teaching a class full of innocent children

Driving down some cold interstate

Did you feel guilty cause you're a survivor

In a crowded room did you feel alone

Did you call up your mother and tell her you love her

Did you dust off that bible at home

Did you open your eyes and hope it never happened

Close your eyes and not go to sleep

Did you notice the sunset the first time in ages

Speak with some stranger on the street

Did you lay down at night and think of tomorrow

Go out and buy you a gun

Did you turn off that violent old movie you're watching

And turn on "I Love Lucy" reruns

Did you go to a church and hold hands with some stranger

Stand in line and give your own blood

Did you just stay home and cling tight to your family

Thank God you had somebody to love

I'm just a singer of simple songs I

'm not a real political manI watch CNN

but I'm not sure I can tell youThe difference in Iraq and Iran

But I know Jesus and I talk to GodAnd I remember this from when I was youngFaith hope and love are some good things

he gave usAnd the greatest is love

I'm just a singer of simple songs

I'm not a real political manI watch CNN

but I'm not sure I can tell youThe difference in Iraq and Iran

But I know Jesus and I talk to GodAnd I remember this from when I was youngFaith hope and love are some good things

he gave us

And the greatest is love

The greatest is love

The greatest is love

Where were you when the world stopped turning that September day

S

Where is Home?

Home is where the heart is, and in the long run does it matter where that is as long as you and your family are there together? My answer to that is yes it does. I miss my family in Texas, I miss my friends in Ohio, but we have made a life here and I don't want to leave it. I don't want Hailee to have to leave her friends that she has made here. Change is just so hard on her. I like this area, and although I haven't made the bonds I made in Ohio I do have friends here and I don't want to leave them. I have tried to get involved here with Hailee's activities and lately I am throwing myself into the light the night walk. since Friday the reality that maybe we will have to move again is starting to sink in. I have asked God to please help me out with this and if it is his will for us to move than so be it, but I don't want that. Although I know that he has a plan, again I am in the wait and see mode of what that plan is. I just really want to find a home where we can stay and live out the rest of our lives there. Where we know we are going to stay and not move our family again. How can it be that the last year and a half of our lives have been filled with so many changes? How can it be that we cant find that happy place? Man I am so tired of this feeling.

Tonight I went out with some girls, and they were talking about buying new houses and such and all I could think was man do I wish I had a house of my own. Heck I just want to know where my home is. Is that really too much to ask? We went out to eat tonight and to a movie. We saw nanny diaries, it was good I read the book a few years ago, so it was nice to have that advantage.

Hailee had her first Girl Scout meeting today, she was very shy to go in the meeting without mom, but Lainey she was ready to go. It was funny. Hailee finally warmed up to the idea and went in with the other girls, I think she had a good time. We don't really have a troop yet, as we don't have a troop leader. I have started the steps to become a troop leader, but who knows if they will pick me. We shall see. But as I learned tonight it is alot of work, but honestly I think I would enjoy it, and I know Hailee would love for her mom to be the troop leader. So I will keep you posted when I hear back from them.

I took Lainey to the Dr. today as I was sure she had pneumonia again, but he said her lungs are clear. I think in a couple of days that will not be the case. Poor girl I gave her a few breathing treatments, and it got to the point where she was coughing so hard she couldn't catch her breath and she said I want a Garrett treatment. It was cute. She knows that Garrett uses the breathing machine so she thought they were Garrett treatments. Well I will close with some cute pictures.

Garrett Talking on the phone, hmm I wonder where he learned that?

Garrett thougth Laineys car was great!

Who doesnt love a naked baby butt?

Garrett with his new train table

Tackling Lainey

Laniey's first day of school